


Coming Down

by The_Theatrical_Revolutionary



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Halsey lyrics as inspiration, Has Plot, Smut, badlands inspiration, im adding smut im kinda not sorry, im going to be one of the first to write an x reader for him probably, likes you but doesnt like liking you, self conscious kylo ren about love and stuff, this is confusing and im bad at tagging im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-17
Updated: 2015-12-23
Packaged: 2018-05-07 06:15:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5446211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Theatrical_Revolutionary/pseuds/The_Theatrical_Revolutionary
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i> when his hair falls in his face, with his hands so cold they shake </i>
</p>
<p>it's stupid going against him but you cannot have expected all this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Found God, I Found Him In A Lover

**Author's Note:**

> took it upon myself to give ben solo a lil loving because he's a sad broken being.
> 
> i hold a grudge against him but problematic favourites you know. can't really forgive him so, this is also pre and a bit of during force awakens (only early scenes).

You only tried to calm him down in one of his fits of rage, slicing the equipment and walls with that lightsaber of his. Did anybody ever try to do that, or were you just stupid? 

Probably stupid but you can't really say you regret a single bit of this at present. It was a dumbass's decision to go against her superior, but it's probably your lucky day if anything.

It's a surprise what you get for trying to stop him.

Key word here, _try._

\--

You whimpered softly as his hands gripped you tightly, no doubt going to leave bruises later. He pushed you up against the wall and held you there. "Oh, don't expect me to be gentle." You kinda hoped he wouldn't honestly, but that's also just your arousal talking probably. He leans to your ear. Also why was he still keeping that mask on? You really just want to see what he looked like, just out of curiosity.

"You should have known that to be expected being on this side."

He ripped through your uniform using his lightsaber, you almost let out a scream, the proximity of the saber to your skin was terrifying. He held a hand to your mouth to muffle the sounds.

"Shh, shh. Be quiet. You wouldn't want anyone to hear us." You nodded slowly, as his hands left you. You were still pressed against the cold wall, contrasting against your hot skin.

You watched in front of you, as your superior, Kylo Ren took off his mask. In awe, and surprise, you see he has a long face, pale skin, long locks of black hair, and a surprisingly youthful face.

He smirks in your direction, and you feel your face flush.

"Surprised now are you?"

And a deep, pleasant voice. Serious, commanding, yet oh so arousing.

_You're staying here for the long run._


	2. Covered In The Colours

It was all a blur, from him taking off his mask and smirking at you, to the current situation of him growling into your ear as your nails dug into his flesh.

His hands, no gloves anymore, tightly grasped your waist as he continued to slam into you, deeper and deeper. His hands before resting on that spot of your body, were roaming all over your skin. Teasing you, with the hint of reprimand and control. With how he was holding you, there were going to be bruises. However, Ren’s lips captured yours in a soft, gentle kiss. Your eyes widened slightly, at the contrast of natures he was projecting, but couldn’t help letting out a moan that was muffled by his mouth.

Kylo Ren broke the kiss to lean his head down to the crook of your shoulder and neck. He licked, bit, and nipped at your hot skin, smiling slightly at the whimpers that he elicited from you. At this, the legs that were already around his hips gripped tighter. His deep breathy groans were getting louder, and god, _you were close already._

Too much feelings and sensations were being felt. Too much simulation in such a short amount of time. Truly, nobody can hold out over a couple minutes with a fucking like this.

His length slid in and out at an alarming rate, and finally, you climaxed, letting out a moan that you hoped wouldn’t be heard from outside, and your nails dragged down his back, leaving long red welts. He hissed as you did so, and came as well.

The thought of him releasing his seed into you didn’t concern your lust clouded mind at the moment, but you relished in the feeling of the warm and thick liquid dripping out of your entrance, onto your thighs.

Your forehead met his shoulder, and he slowly let you down on the ground, your legs unwrapping from around him and your feet meeting the floor. Both of you were silent, with faces flushed. You looked up at him in embarrassment, with his height no longer intimidating you as much as it did before, then glanced at the torn up and slightly burnt uniform that lay on the floor.

He looked at it in a neutral expression, then at you trying to cover your naked form.

His eyes softened at your panic. “Wait here.” He got his clothes, cloak, and mask on, then strided out of the room. Your common sense came back little by little, and you leaned on one of the destroyed control boards. You sighed deeply, burying your face in your hands.

“What the hell did I just do?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I never really expected anyone to be interested in that short quicky written chapter! I'm really thankful for all that support. So here's the next chapter. 
> 
> To give you guys some resolve on when I update, it'll be about 3-5 days between each one, since I always have writers block. But no joke, seeing all of the stats on this, my day brightened instantly amidst the heavy rains yesterday.


	3. Kiss Me In The Corridor But Quick To Tell Me Goodbye

While you were wallowing in your stupid decisions, annoyed at yourself and your weak will. Maybe because of those fantasies as well, but that is completely unnecessary. You finally stopped getting angry at yourself when you hear the door slide open.

You look up from your hands and lap to see Kylo Ren yet again, seemingly staring at you. Dumbstruck, you want to just apologise for being desperate, and for going against orders or his will, or hell, apologise for having sex with him. You had no idea except the fact embarrassment ran through your mind, and dominated your thoughts. “Sir, I really did not mean to cause all of-“

He cut you off with a raise of his gloved hand. He walked over to you after closing the door, and you finally noticed he had a spare change of clothes, the uniform that was required on base. He held it out to you, and you slowly reached up to get them.

He didn’t let go just yet.

In his warped and disguised voice from the mask, he reassured you. “I should be the one to say that.” You gaped. Kylo Ren, a new villain in the scene, notorious for his temper and unforgiving nature, was telling you not to be sorry?

What is he, a tough guy with a heart of gold? Probably not. But, you did here a little gossip here and there, saying he isn’t completely evil. You can kind of see it now, and you can’t help but believe what they were saying.

“E-excuse me?” You choked out in disbelief. “It’s unprofessional, as well as a hinderance to your work time. I’ve kept you from the control room for a while haven’t I?” He simultaneously removes his mask again in your presence, his raven curls falling out in the most entrancing way. Half of the sentence is in that odd garble, and the rest is in that extremely pleasant and low voice of his. His tone is not a deceivingly affectionate or teasing tone, it’s official.

He spoke matter of factly, and his face gave it away as well. He raised a single eyebrow, and looked away. “I do suggest you change into that uniform already. Might get late.” He finally let the clothes slip into your arms and he walked away. He didn’t leave though,as you would have thought. He stood, tapping his foot against the floor, a few feet away from you.

At this point you got the idea to finally put on the uniform he brought you, thankfully bringing pants instead of a skirt since your stockings got wrecked as well. You decked your heels, and took a step towards your fallen pile of torn and singed clothes. Picking them up, you held the articles of clothing in as inconspicuous a way as possible to throw into the garbage on your way to your station. He glanced in your direction, and your eyes met.

In the single most awkward way possible he immediately turned away and cleared his throat, arms crossed and feet tapping faster. Your face felt hot, and you decided to walk up to him. This is probably really stupid to do to a feared leader, knowing he could kill you with no remorse with a single flick of the wrist. 

You breathed out as came up beside him, completely dwarfed just by his height. “I..thanks I guess. And I was on break when I saw sparks coming out of one of the rooms, so uh, not really a problem.” Before leaving, you stood on your toes, and he noticed out of the corner of his eye. It was characterised by him turning his head and craning his neck down a bit. 

Straining to get to the right height, you pressed a soft chaste kiss to his pale cheek. Yeah that was a bad idea, but what do you have to lose? His eyes widened, and his fair cheeks flushed a light pink. _Must be awkward with that lovey dovey shit._ You couldn’t help it. It seemed right, but at the same time, so wrong and so odd.

You waved a goodbye to him, a pounding in your chest prompting you to walk away briskly, not minding the stares you got from your fellow coworkers as you exited the room. You last heard the door slide shut and the clicking of your heels.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did promise about 3-5 days but I'm going to be busy until December 26, so I won't be able to write. In case I am going to try to upload another one tomorrow so I hope that's okay with you guys.


	4. I Think There's A Flaw In My Code

Unbeknownst to you as you rushed to throw away your unusable uniform, your superior held a hand to his cheek, the one you just kissed. His eyes are wide, and his face grows hotter.

_**It can’t be. It cannot be this again.** _

He slips his mask on, and put on his hood, trying to hide his confusion as he storms out of the room. His walk sends others into shocked silence, and they stay out of his way. _Good._

He still can’t keep those thoughts away. Not thoughts of that thing you shared in that room, not of his skin flushed against yours. He thinks of the way he thought of getting clothes for you, as if he’d do it at all for anyone else. He thinks of the embarrassment he felt for ripping your clothes. He thinks of that innocent kiss.

Kylo Ren thinks of you. He clenches his jaw. Holding in a growl and keeping back the urge to slash at walls again, he walks faster to his quarters.

He locks the sliding door, and he slumps on his bed, removing his mask to breathe.

He feels a pang in his heart telling him that he should have done something. His hands run through his hair in frustration. 

He feels it again. And he wants to shout and curse you out like he did his father, but he can’t fathom it. He wants to hate it, but the butterflies and warmth come back to him. He loves you and he doesn’t want to. He breathes heavily, panic and disgust setting in. He is disgusted with himself that he loves so easily. He just doesn’t hate you as much as his dad, he realises.

You haven’t left him. You have shown the smallest bits of affection towards him, no matter how insignificant it may seem. He cracks an almost pained looking smile. _We are ruled by emotion. By passion. I can use this as strength. I will use it for victory._ He straightens his back again, confidence flooding back into him.

It’s a make or break situation, and he knows you can help him, or destroy him.

He stands up with intensity in his eyes, heading to one of the control rooms. His hands grab his mask, as he put it on with newfound conviction.

Plans ran through his head but he decided that whatever is right will come to him. You sure as hell aren't expecting any of the events coming after trying to calm down a fire while sparks flew. 

He took one step out of his room when he realised two things. Firstly, which of the control rooms did you work in? And more importantly, _what was your name?_

Under his mask, his eye twitched in anger. _How could I be so stupid? Forgetting something as simple as a name?_ He couldn't hold his wrath in any longer.

The stormtroopers patrolling the area nearly jumped in surprise when in the hallway behind them, a roar echoed through the facility, the red and orange embers left a glow on their white armour as they bounced off the walls.

When he finally calmed down, he leaned against a scratched up glowing wall. He hoped you would be there to stop him. You weren't. Now, he just had to look for you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ehehehh I'm going to admit that Kylo Ren here is pretty OOC. (it's mostly because I can see him being weak and in denial if he feels love, because of obvious things in the movie.)
> 
> My plan is mostly to write a different side for his character. A softer, slightly happier pre Force Awakens Ren. And also because he can be kinda angsty, so comfort. 
> 
> Expect lots and lots of fluff for this poor guy who probably never got hugs.


End file.
